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The Universes a Billion Years from Today

New stars and planets form

“Don’t look at me,” remarked God. “I had nothing to do with it this time.”

Life develops on 6,985,945 planets

“I really didn’t see that one coming,” said God.

Humans appear on earth

And they come in 92,345 different races.

New technology allows humans to look into past

I can’t believe people used to churn cream into butter.

The Simpsons redebuts on Fox

But for some reason, Marge’s hair is glow-in-the-dark green.

God comments on new universe

“I would’ve done a much better job. I mean, the earth’s moon is shaped like a dildo.”

Nature sues God for dildo remark

“This is ridiculous,” said God.

God chooses the Italians

“Picking the Hebrews again would’ve been too predictable.”

Universes hear song from unknown source

For no apparent reason, an ancient “Macarena” remix has been playing throughout the universes for the last 53 minutes.


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