Moses - Save 30% on your car insurance
Your Ex-Girlfriend - Go Fuck Yourself!!!!
Dan’s Dildo Emporium - Your order has shipped
Timmy - Who’s There? (RE: Knock Knock)
Jimmy - To get to the other side (RE: Why did the chicken
eBay - You won this item: 1 paper clip
Netflix Receiving - We’ve received: a slice of cheese
Your Girlfriend - I missed my period
Your Other Girlfriend - I missed my period
Your Wife - Divorce
Facebook - OJ Simpson wants to add you as a friend
Jim - Fwd: Beware of Nigerian Email Scam
Wealthy Nigerian Man - I Need Your Help
God - Fwd: Beware of Satan
Satan - Beware of God
Your Wife - Top 10 Reasons Why You Suck
Tom from MySpace - You’re really not much of a friend
Internal Revenue Service - You owe us money, motherfucker!
Mastervisa Express - You owe us money, motherfucker!
Your Son - Can I borrow some money?
Perverted Porn Network - You’re a fucking pervert!
Your Psychiatrist - You’re a fucking pervert!
Your Dominatrix - You’re not perverted enough for me
Jim from Work - You’re invited to view my nude photos
Bill Gates - If I could charge you for the internet, I would
Your Inbox - Ever heard of the delete button?