European Lunch Breaks

Europeans spend most of their lives on lunch breaks. They're the biggest pieces of garbage on the entire planet.

Go to any city in Europe at 1 p.m., and the entire city will be on a lunch break. The police, the fire department, the mayor--everyone. They all have to go at the same time. Those can't take turns. If some European house happens to be on fire during the city's lunch break, the city will just watch it burn while they drink their cappucinos. That's how they do things in Europe. That's the product of three thousand years worth of civilization.

The average European takes four lunch breaks per day--and each one is over four hours long. Northern Europe is even worse. Over there, they take lunch breaks during their lunch breaks.

90% of Barack Obama's presidency has been a lunch break. (The other 10% has been a jihad.) He wants to turn this country into West Northern Europe.

But real Americans take five minute lunch breaks. And they spend the entire time thinking about bald eagles, the Grand Canyon, and killing Jim Jong Il.

Andrew Carnegie was the richest man on the planet. Over the course of his life, he spent a grand total of eighty seven minutes on lunch breaks.

Richard Nixon was the greatest American ever. He worked while he ate lunch. He worked while he slept. He died 17 years ago, and he still has yet to take a lunch break. He's too busy.

I'm a Real American