I'm a Lot Like Kamau Kambon

I'm a lot like Dr. Kamau Kambon. Here are several of his quotes that illustrate just how much we have in common.

"I neither fancy myself as a leader nor a hero." Dr. Kamau Kambon, former professor of education at St. Augustine's College

(Just like Dr. Kambon, I'm so humble that I regard myself as neither a leader nor a hero, even though I'm both.)

"I pay my entire share of taxes and never evade paying taxes." Dr. Kamau Kambon, recipient of the 1999 Independent Weekly Citizen's Award, and former New England high school social studies and geography teacher

(Like Dr. Kambon, I pay my taxes. Plus, I also collect unemployment benefits.)

"I am merely reporting the historical facts and the facts speak for themselves. Anything that I have said is verifiable and anyone can go and look up the same information, if they want to become an educated person." Dr. Kamau Kambon, creator of the Juvenile Intervention and Enlightenment Program, and former North Carolina State University visiting professor of African-American Studies

(Just like Dr. Kambon, I know that my opinions are facts, and that anyone who disagrees with me is uneducated.)

"I am Afrikan, and see myself connected to Afrikans all over the world." Dr. Kamau Kambon, owner of Blacknificent Books

(I also see myself connected to Afrikans all over the world, and I also spell Africans "Afrikans.")

"I am happily married to the same Afrikan woman for almost three decades and I have never had an illicit affair outside of my marriage." Dr. Kamau Kambon, author of Food Health and You: Why Black People Die So Young

(Like Dr. Kambon, I have a subscription to Jet Magazine, and I'm married to the same Afrikan woman that he's married to.)

"I have not celebrated a european holiday since around 1970." Dr. Kamau Kambon, author of Tips on Quick and Easy Ways Afrikans Can Commit Subtle Suicide

(I don't celebrate european holidays, either--plus I don't even bother with the european calendar. March 3rd my ass. It's day 62.)

"I do not want to be killed by the government or any white or Black person--or any other person for that matter--who does not like what I have had to say." Dr. Kamau Kambon, author of Black Guerrilla Warfare in amerika: a Peoples' Manual and Manifesto on Resistance and Survival

(I agree. Also, like Dr. Kambon, I capitalize the B in BLACK, but not the w in white. Except I capitalize the entire word BLACK, and I always follow "white" with "devil." Even when I'm talking about crayons. "white devil crayons are used forty percent less than BLACK crayons.")

"Over the course of my life, I have never intentionally physically harmed anyone, and am polite, express good manners, generally quiet with not much to say and do not hate anyone." Dr. Kamau Kambon, Master of the Universe

(If by "anyone," he meant "anyone who has never offended me or pissed me off," then I'm just like Dr. Kambau.)

"[White people] have retina scans, they have what they call racial profiling, DNA banks, and they're monitoring our people to try to prevent the one person from coming up with the one idea. And the one idea is, how we are going to exterminate white people." Dr. Kamau Kambon, nonsmoker

(Being that I'm white, I don't agree with Dr. Kambon 100% here--but substitute "white people" with "white conservatives," and I'm on board.)

"White people [i.e. Republicans] want to kill us. I want you to understand that. They want to kill you. They want to kill you because that is part of their plan." Dr. Kamau Kambon, my best friend

Books recommended by Dr. Kamau Kambon: Count-Down to Black Genocide, Somebody's Trying to Kill You: the Psychodynamics of white racism and Black Pathology, Afrikan People and European Holidays: A Mental Genocide

(Not only do I also recommend those books, I think we should tattoo them into the retinas of all white conservatives.)

Kamau Kambon Kamau Kambon
Kamau Kambon