Glenn Beck was born in a manger on July 4, 1964. At the age of age of 3, he started the Glenn Beck Program and began warning us about bin Laden. And all other Muslims. And all non-Americans. And all liberal Americans. Especially Matt Damon. Matt Damon hadn't even been born yet, but Glenn Beck knew about that bastard.
At the age of six, Glenn created the world's third website: glennbeck.com. (The first two--foxnews.com and buick.com--were created by Richard Nixon. Along with the internet.)
During the Nixon administration, Glenn expanded Joe McCarthy's list to 124,953 people.
But then on January 20, 1977, the Devil tempted Glenn with a marijuana cigarette--and unlike Jesus, he didn't pull out a gun and shoot him. Instead, he became a marijuana smoking degenerate.
And the Glenn Beck Program turned into some horseshit show about soccer, homosexuals, and celebrities. Glenn bounced around from station to station and city to city, corrupting millions like some Howard Stern piece of garbage.
But then in 1993, while watching a tape of Roger & Me at his marijuana dealer's Seattle home, Glenn became enraged and began a personal war against marijuana, liberal bullshit, (Muslim) terrorists, Muslims ( / terrorists), and MTV. He also expanded his list of communists to 1,230,675 people--including Dr. Seuss and Mr. Rogers.
In 2006, Glenn's show began airing on CNN Headline News; and in 2009, it debuted on FOX News. CNN had a chance to promote Glenn's good news and be a respectable network, but it chose to side with communists. Odds are it's now working for Kim Jong Il.
Glenn has read over 172,000 books--163,000 of which are the Bible, the Book of Mormon, and Jesus's commentary on the Constitution. His entire home is wallpapered with the Constitution. And every object in it is a crucifix. The beds, tables, chairs--everything. Except for the toilets, which are sculptures of Obama in Kenya.
Communists and Muslims are trying to take over the world and destroy everything that's holy. The mainstream media, however, is going out of its way to hide that and turn you into a liberal piece of garbage. It's trying to convince you that Glenn is some crazy radical with outlandish views based on lies and exaggerations.
Glenn Beck is preventing this country from becoming what this son of a bitch is calling the Atheist-Islamic Republic of America. Most liberals are religion-hating communists , most Muslims are terrorists--and Barack Hussein Obama is both. If it weren't for people like Glenn Beck, we wouldn't know how 98% of the non conservative American world consists of extremists. We wouldn't know that--notwithstanding what Chairman Obama's liberal media has been telling us--real inflation is at 174%, and real unemployment is at 84%. We wouldn't know about the real history of the world--one where liberals are 100% wrong about everything. And we wouldn't know that buying gold from Goldline is a sound financial decision
...[Progressivism] is the disease. ...Progressivism is the cancer in America and it is eating our Constitution!
...To the day I die I am going to be a progressive-hunter. I’m going to find these people that have done this to our country and expose them. I don’t care if they're in nursing homes.
...The Nazis were using early American progressive tactics.
So here you have Barack Obama going in and spending the money on embryonic stem cell research. ... Eugenics. In case you don't know what Eugenics led us to: the Final Solution. A master race! A perfect person. ... The stuff that we are facing is absolutely frightening.
[Obama has repeatedly shown] a deep-seated hatred for white people or the white culture. ...He has a problem. This guy is... a racist.
We have a president who... loves instability and revolution,
Every night I get down on my knees and pray that Dennis Kucinich will burst into flames.
You got to have an enemy to fight. And when you have an enemy to fight, then you can unite the entire world behind you, and you seize power. That was Hitler's plan. His enemy: the Jew. Al Gore's enemy, the U.N.'s enemy: global warming. Then you get the scientists — eugenics. You get the scientists — global warming. Then you have to discredit the scientists who say, 'That's not right.' And you must silence all dissenting voices. That's what Hitler did.
The most used phrase in my administration if I were to be President would be "What the hell you mean we're out of missiles?"
Most of America doesn't have a clue as to what's going on. There is a coup going on. There is a stealing of America, and the way it is done, it has been done through the — the guise of an election, but they lied to us the entire time. Some of us knew! Some of us we're shouting out, you were: "this guy's a Marxist!" "No, no, no, no, no, no." And they're gonna say, "we did it democratically," and they are going to grab power every way they can. And God help us in an emergency.
Let me tell you this: They shut me down on radio, that's fine, I'll do TV. They shut me down on TV, that's fine, I'll do Internet. They shut me down on the Internet, that's fine, I'll do stage shows. They shut me down on stage shows, that's fine, I'll go door to door. You will have to shoot me in the head. We are not stopping.
...There are a lot of universities that are just as dangerous with indoctrination of our children as these terror groups are in Iran or North Korea. With the poll numbers continuing to slide for the new health care bill, our Health and Human Services Secretary Kathleen Sebelius just said, and I quote, "We need a re-education process on healthcare." Oh. Well, how very Kim Jong-Il of you. Or dare I say it? Mao is the "in" one now, isn't he? ... America, while you have been working hard, while you have been busting your butt, while you have thought we all generally agree on things, we have been setting up re-education camps. We call them "universities."
...Don't do a Google search. ...Google is pretty deeply in bed with the government. ... Are they just a shill now for the United States government? ... [Jared Cohen] is the second Google executive now being exposed as an instigator of a revolution. ... We have the State Department working together with Google, MTV, MSNBC, Facebook, all of these— all of these giant corporations. Google now has two executives that we know of that were charged to help this revolution. ... Is there anything more powerful than Google? And our government is in bed with them... in unbelievable ways. ... We have, um, and have had for a while, people inside of Google who have alerted this program to things. There are people inside of Google who are terrified of some of the things that Google is doing and is involved in.
It is difficult to deny at this point, isn't it? Isn't it? Is it a little hard to deny that radicals, Islamicists, Communists, socialists will work together against Israel, against capitalism, and they'll try to work together to overturn stability? Who in the media is telling you this? Who? NAME THEM! Where are they? How can they possibly deny it at this point? And why wouldn't they tell you these things? Why?
You self-centered self-righteous socialist out of control dangerous man-hating bitch. Shut your mouth. We might have bought into this crap in the 1960s because too many people were doing LSD. We're not on LSD anymore--we need to start making sense.
"His anti-Obama, anti-socialist monologues are pure" Will Bunch
"...There’s no inherent contradiction between his sophisticated instinct for self-promotion,... his self-image as a media mogul, and his professed belief system. ...God wants him to make a ton of money and become this huge celebrity by fear mongering and generally doing whatever it takes in the media to promote right-wing causes." Alexander Zaitchik
"Glenn Beck is trying to give viewers a version of American history that is ... hidden. ...Historians--left, right and center--... keep true American history from you. And that true American history is what Glenn Beck is teaching." Sean Wilentz
"Beck offers... access to secret knowledge." David Frum
"...A revolution has begun in this country--a 'stealing of America in the guise of an election' ... and his [Glenn Beck's] repeated insistence that the President is a Marxist... is ... the essential truth" Keith Olbermann
Barack Hussein Obama (But not because he's black. Glenn Beck loves black people. If you don't believe me, just watch his show's intro. It includes pictures of Martin Luther King, Frederick Douglass, Harriet Tubman, and a few hundred other black Americans. Barack Obama, on the other hand, hates black people. As do all other liberals.)
Van Jones
Al Gore
Che Guevara
Woodrow Wilson
Saul Alinsky
Students for a Democratic Society
Association of Community Organizations for Reform Now (ACORN)
Wade Rathke
Service Employees International Union (SEIU)
Dale Rathke
Bill Ayers
Valerie Jarrett
Apollo Alliance
Leo Gerard
Carl Pope
Ruben Aronin
Jeff Jones
John Dewey
Herbert Croly
Walter Lippmann
Franklin D. Roosevelt
The New Deal
Cass Sunstein
Andy Stern
John Podesta
Wade Rathke
Joel Rogers
Francis Fox Piven
Franklin Raines
Maurice Strong
George Soros
John Holdren