Rodney Ohebsion

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News


World’s Strongest Man refuses to open jar for wife

Man seeks treatment for Sportscenter addiction

Rock, paper, scissors champ uses rock 73 straight times

Icelandic man wins World Series of Sunbathing

WWE forms Full Contact Musical Chairs League

Lee defeats Liddell in Kung Fu fan’s imagination

Liddell defeats Lee in UFC fan’s imagination

“We’re going to win it all!” says overly optimistic fan

Favre hints at comeback

Favre denies comeback rumors

“I’m coming back,” says Favre

“I never said I was coming back,” says Favre

Favre spotted buying jockstrap

Favre spotted returning jockstrap

Orioles sign Dominican 3 year old to $2.3 million deal

Reds sign Venezuelan fetus to $1.7 million deal

Astros acquire rights to Albert Pujols’s next two sons

Cardinals pay $2.3 million for Alex Rodriguez’s semen

Yankees purchase Puerto Rico for $927 billion

Mariners owner attempts to clone Ken Griffey, Jr.

“I’ve never even heard of steroids,” says 328 pound home run champ

Golf continues to bore most of us

“Just once, I’d like to run clockwise,” says track star

Ali guarantees third round knockout over Frazier

Tyson guarantees he’ll “kill that white motherfucker and sodomize his corpse”

De La Hoya guarantees he’ll “make a lot of money”

Foreman guarantees his grill will knock out the fat

348 pound lightweight boxer sues for weight discrimination

Bodybuilder says he has “killer quads”

Surfer describes a wave as “gnarly”

Beach volleyball star develops sand allergy

“I have no intention of going to Disneyland,” says Super Bowl winning QB

New Nike deal gives MJ, Tiger, and Lebron the entire company

“It’s all about the team,” says basketball star after breaking FG attempt record

All star goalie quits at age 23: “My face is too pretty to hide behind a mask”

Christian football player accidentally thanks Buddha for win

Atheist basketball player accidentally thanks God for win

God accidentally thanks Peyton Manning for win

Mexican sportscaster drops dead after yelling “Goal!”for 42 minutes

73 year old Jew climbs Mount Everest, complains about view

Sumo wrestler loses 200 pounds, signs deal with Jenny Craig

Sumo wrestler gains 200 pounds, sues Jenny Craig

Jenny Craig gains 40 pounds, sues herself

Hacky sack champion tests negative for marijuana

Hot dog eating champion seeks treatment for anorexia

Thumb wrestling champion sprains thumb

Sports trivia grandmaster can’t remember his wife’s birthday

Entire city of Buffalo on suicide watch for Bills-Eagles Super Bowl

Badminton player laughs after hearing the word “shuttlecock”

Superstitious dart thrower keeps actual bull’s eye in pocket

Bowler somehow knocks down 11 pins

Shawn Kemp somehow gets pregnant

“I thought we were playing doubles,” says stoned tennis player after loss

“I thought we were playing hopscotch,” says really stoned tennis player after loss

Hippie swimmer refuses to shave beard

Pro wrestler turned governor hits mayor with chair

Marco Polo champion admits his eyes were only 7/8 closed

“Ray Ray” Judkins named to athlete entourage Hall of Fame

Sissy coach punts on 4th and 1 from midfield while trailing by 7 in 3rd quarter

Lunatic coach goes for it on 4th & 1 from midfield while trailing by 7 in 3rd qtr.

Helmet Trick: Al Davis fires three head coaches in one game

“Hot Quarter” Quimby wins World Series of Lottery Scratchers

Romo 4-0 since first date with Spears

Cowboy fans urge Romo to marry Spears

Cowboy fans force Romo to marry Spears

Romo loses three straight after wedding

Jerry Jones forces Romo to divorce Spears

Romo wins three straight after converting to Buddhism

Texas secedes from the Union, changes name to Buddhist Republic of Texas

Cowboys sign the Dalai Lama to a 4 year deal worth $48 million

Lama wins fourth Super Bowl MVP

Cowboys change stadium name to Lamabeau Field

Wrestler not sure if he’s a face or heel, changes name to “Identity Crisis”

Victoria Beckham wins 3rd straight Dieting Championship

PLO member and Jewish wife to face off in Complaining Championship

Lakers move to South Dakota, change name to Plastic Surgeons


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