Disneyland Needs a Makeover

I recently went to Disneyland in hopes of finding something new to complain about--and I found a lot. Admission isn't free, the food isn't organic, there aren't enough black people there, whites aren't forced to sit at the back of the rides, there's no conservative American trying to kill the other people in "It's a Small World," conservatives aren't charged extra for admission, none of the rides are called "Bill O'Reilly Is An Asshole," Mickey Mouse isn't an atheist, there are no air humidifiers, there are no Islamic community centers, there are no marijuana vendors, and Israel is recognized as a country

But that's not all.

There isn't so much as a single openly gay Disney character! Not one! 25% of the world population is gay--but in a world of intolerance known as Disneyland, all homosexuals are pretty much tarred and feathered. In fact, at one point, I'm pretty sure I saw an anti-gay parade! (In all fairness to Disneyland, I was high on LSD at the time--so maybe it was just a pro-heterosexuality parade.)